"All right Mr Bender, before we enrol you in this clinical trial I need to be certain that you do not now, or ever have in the past, partake of any recreational drug, specifically those targeting the CB1 receptors in your brain?"
"Well yeah man, like sure, err, I mean, like no, like what was the question?"
"I'll take that as a no"
"Well sure doc, whatever, like, that's cool. You got something new for me to try?"
"We've developed hemopressin, a totally natural appetite modifying peptide. We don't know where it works in the brain, which neuronal circuits it influences or whether it is safe in humans. We think it's a good idea to give it to you at industrial dose rates which will flood your whole body to boost the micromolar concentrations naturally present in your brain. We think it's harmless and won't produce the depression or suicidal ideation which had Rimonabant withdrawn from the market a few years back. There's a big cheque involved."
"Ok doc, whatever. Like, ok, err, how much did you err like err, um, pay me?"
"My secretary will assist you with completing the deposit slip for your bank account. You do have a bank account?"
"Yeah, well, yeah, well, I can't remember really, did you say bank errr account...?"
"That door there, Mr Bender, the one you came in through."
"Ok, yeah, right"
Two weeks later
"Ah, good morning Mr Bender, a lovely day."
"What's the point? I think I'll just kill myself"
"How is you preoccupation with food?"
"What's the point? I think I'll just kill myself."
"Have you noticed any change in post coital satisfaction?"
"What's the point? I think I'll just kill myself."
"How is your satisfaction rating for visual appreciation?"
"What's the point, I think I'll just kill myself."
"Heard any good bands in the last two weeks?"
"What's the point, I think I'll just kill myself."
"Hmmmmmm. But interest in food is really down, yes?"
"What's the point, I think I'll just kill myself. Oh, Doc, before I go do it, those obese babies in nappies, are they on dope to get that obese? And the fat bankers too, they pot heads too? Never mind. What's the point, I think I'll just kill myself."
"Hmmmmm, partial success with that one I think..."
This post might be less perplexing if you've read this press release about this paper. Hemopressin will bomb like Rimonabant. It's based on the "toxic food environment" hypothesis, which says that the only reason I weigh under 65kg is my diet is too non-hedonistic for me to over indulge in. Conversely a toke of dope should make you obese by rendering the contents of the food aisle of a late night garage in to an hedonistic experience....
BTW, being a good member of law abiding citizenry I have no idea who does or doesn't do dope. But obesity is not a feature of any of the people whom I don't know don't do dope. I've heard about the munchies. I guess dope heads must eat less next day or exercise more, the skinny ones that is....
Peter
OK back to the OD and homocysteine as soon as I can get the next post written. Loads of great links have been emailed to me too, if I could just remember where I left them...
Showing posts with label Rimonabant and hemopressin. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rimonabant and hemopressin. Show all posts
Sunday, July 11, 2010
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